The Flaneur of Emotions by Tanaya Sharma, 12-B

Oh, to be the flaneur when it comes to experiencing the manifold, eerie but beautiful plethora of human emotions,

To see from the outside, right when you know, but also don’t know what it feels like, going through from being together with silence to being alone with commotion.

In happiness, I see her eyes shine and emulate what she feels, what she yearned for all this time,

The euphoria she felt over just a small thing, but it still mattered so much to her, it seemed like a beauteous crime.

Why was it like that, why was she looked at so weirdly by others to feel something like that so divine?

In anger, I see her finding the silliest of ounces as the worst accidents, the ones closest to her as her enemies.

But is she angry at herself that she messed up despite being really careful this time or at her fate for always failing her, always bringing to her adversities.

Why was it like that, why didn’t anyone just sit by her side and try to understand her instead of pointing out her peculiarities?

In sadness, I see it radiate all around her, anyone and everyone sensing and absorbing it so easily.

In stillness, she doubts, she questions, she cries, and she blames all her gremlins only at herself, all so conveniently.

Why was it like that, why didn’t anyone just realise and help her that she was going through something like this so draining, mentally?

In insecurity, I see her finding flaws and blemishes in herself, many and more, day by day, hoping they would go away at least this time, she waits.

She doesn’t try to be prettier or better than anyone else, but herself, the girl she is now, the girl who she from the bottom of her heart, hates.

Why was it like that, why couldn’t anyone just give her the few words of affirmation she needed and not just always candidly make fun of her traits?

In love, I see her admire him like he is the only star in the night sky, even if there were other stars, he was always her favourite, forever.

She sits and thinks about the beguiling play of love, lovers and love stories, she sits and thinks about him, but she doubts will that happen, ever?

Why was it like that, why couldn’t he just come and give her those words of love she waited for every passing moment, waiting just for them to be together?

In fear, I see her scared but now not just of darkness like how she always was, but now about what the future holds for her, what will be built.

She is scared about what can go wrong for her in what plausible way, she wishes everything goes as how she thinks, but that’s not how it goes, does it?

Why was it like that, why couldn’t someone affirm her that no matter what we do, how much we try, it is whatever is destined for us to commit?

In peace, I finally see her, in serenity, after going through that rollercoaster of emotions, learning the peculiar human element.

But she thought a bit, this isn’t it, right? it is just never the end to this journey, maybe because we are just never content.

Why was is like that, why couldn’t someone make her realise that we are humans, this is how it goes, this is what is meant?

Oh, to be the flaneur when it comes to experiencing the manifold, eerie but beautiful plethora of human emotions,

Seeing people go through something so familiar but yet so different, seeing people falling in the trap of serendipity, seeing people drowning in and saving themselves from their own thoughts’ oceans.

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